One time, when I was in high school, I went to the hairdresser’s to get my hair done.
I was wearing a shirt that I remember well. It was all buttoned up; I wasn't trying to seduce anyone.
“I want to lick your pussy,”
He said in a disgusting whisper.
It was 2 in the afternoon,
In a relatively wide street.
I turned around,
And my body froze.
I wanted to vomit.
Sexual violence; harassment; the street
My first experience with harassment was, unfortunately, from the person closest to me.
That person also happened to be my cousin who was a few years older than me.
She would spend the summers at our place, and my parents would go to work.
gender violence, sexual violence, harassment
I never ran or even moved from my place.
I remember really well,
When I’d run up the stairs,
Or run in Agamy market.
I was waiting for the tram,
When I saw them coming towards me,
And calling two others from behind.
“Why did you go there?”
Whenever someone asks me that,
I feel as if they only see me as a piece of meat that should be covered.
I get the urge to just cut parts off my body whenever I walk down the street.
When I was ten years old,
The sheikh called me to him and took me inside a closet,
Where he touched my private parts.
He instructed me to put on my nightgown.
I put it on, but I didn't want to leave the bedroom wearing nothing but it.
“Goddamn it,” he exclaimed, “Let’s try and get this done sometime today!”
“Your family’s waiting in the street!”
domestic violence, gender violence, sexual violence, sex education, sex work, virginity testing
I used to wear skirts and blouses.
I had a good body, and my breasts were relatively perky.
gender violence, sexual violence, harassment, the street
I remember the pushing,
The kicking,
And the yelling.
I remember every time I said no,
And how he continued anyway.
At times,
I felt as if I were transforming into a pillow,
By the way he’d close his eyes,
And forget that I was even there.
It killed me.
gender violence; sexual violence; rape; masculinity; sex; sexuality