There's Nothing You Can Do About It

“You know, if you weren’t a public figure that appeared on TV,
And who talks about women’s rights in the papers,
I would’ve loved you, married you, and made you quit your job to be a housewife.”

I hear those sort of comments all the time.
Since when was writing considered inappropriate and haram for women?
Do you really think talking about women’s rights, street harassment, and injustice in the workplace and at home is a waste of time?

Who do you think you are, making me choose between marriage and my passion?
Screw this!
Why should getting married make me quit my job and be a housewife?
Are you marrying me or burying my existence?
It’s just weird.

Weren’t you the one who applauded me for being a writer?
“Way to go! Bravo! She has strong opinions and an admirable personality!”
You were over the moon with me.
I respected you at the time.
I thought that that was true manliness.
But then, he told me to slow down and take it easy.
“You’re being too blunt. What will people say?”
“I’m advising you as a friend.”
A friend?!
Let’s highlight the word “friend” here, my dear listeners and readers.
Aren’t you the one who’s been insulting me all year long?
When did we become friends all of a sudden?

“I can accept the things you say about me if you say them to me as a friend,”
he continued, “But turning it into a book and appearing on T.V.,
That could ruin your reputation as a woman.
It’s up to you.
You’re like a sister to me.
Men are intimidated by bold women,
And those with loud voices, who speak freely about everything.
You’re going to be a spinster if you keep this up.”

This doesn’t concern you!
Why are you speaking on behalf of all men?
Do I not deserve love just because I’m a writer — regardless of what people think of my views?

Why should a woman who speaks up in a passive society be deemed as rude and ill-mannered?
What’s forcing you to be with someone with bold opinions?
Why don’t you just be with someone who’s obedient and compliant?

Things were like this a long time ago.
Are you not living with us in the same world?
Are you incapable of speaking up and expressing yourself?
Have you not been with women before?
Have you not made any mistakes?

Will you be happy with a subservient woman?
One that doesn’t react to anything?
There aren’t any women like that anymore, anyway.

A pharmacist friend of mine, who’s well-built and well-established, once told me,
“My mother went to the countryside to find me a wife.
It’s safer marrying someone from the family.”
Oh my God.
Women are not commodities or mannequins for you to check out.
I refuse to allow someone to check me out that way.
And I reject anyone that thinks that way.
And he’s supposed to be a pharmacist!

Women are not flawless.
Some of them work on themselves by reading, learning and travelling.
This is not something to be ashamed of.
Having strong opinions doesn’t negate the fact that I’m well-mannered.
I hope people like you stop existing.

Love, relationships, and marriage don’t mean women shouldn’t speak up.
I want to give you a piece of advice, just between you and me, because I know you care about what people think:
Go and boil your head.
This is who I am. I will not change.
I have to speak up for myself, my children, and for the generation that needs to raise their voices, speak up, and not be afraid.
You have no right to force me to stay at home.
You have no right to ask me to change how I look.
Just because I’m outgoing doesn’t mean I’m easy.
Who ever said this equals that?
Who gave you the right to call me easy in front of everyone?

Half the Egyptian population has my number for work reasons.
Don’t cry, I’ll get another personal line just for you.
But don’t you ever tell me,
“Those who are friends with writers, journalists and artists, or those who sing and act, are ill-mannered.”
If you do, this is my reply,
“Go screw yourself. You do nothing but take pictures with female celebrities like Laila Elwi and Haifa Wehbe to post them on Facebook.”
You’re not worth all of this.

Abbas Abo el-Hassan was right when he said in Mafia,
“You Egyptian people are weird.
You believe in weird stuff.”
“You know, if you weren’t a public figure that appears on TV,
And who talks about women’s rights in the papers,
I would’ve loved you, married you, and made you quit your job to be a housewife.”
Go to hell.

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