I Had Nowhere to Go

2018

I was released by the 4th night.
I went home, carrying the clothes and stuff I had with me in jail.
I knocked on my family’s door.
I needed to go to the bathroom. I wanted to shower and all that.
prison, social stigma, marriage

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We Don't Talk About It

2018

My problem is that I am staying at my ex-husband’s apartment.
After I was released from jail, my children all got either engaged or married.
We told people that their father was a political detainee.
And that I lived near where he was held to visit him and bring him food.
prison, social stigma

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I Thought I Wouldn't Make It

2018

At first, I thought I wouldn’t survive prison.
But in fact, the experience made me stronger.
I didn’t need help from anyone.
I unloaded things at the prison gate, worked as a yard cleaner and a cook.
Everyone would tell me that I wouldn’t be able to make it in there.
prison

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The Last Day in Prison

2018

We got out the day before Eid; we had received a pardon.
We woke up in the morning thinking it was just a regular day.
During the sports period, one of the inmates told us that we’d be getting out that day.
prison

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First Day in Prison

2018

I was 20 years old when I went to prison.
I kept trying to run away on the first day, and each time Umm Zakaria would run after me and bring me back.
“What’s the matter with you? Will you keep trying to run away like this?”
“They’re going to hurt me in there.”
prison, bullying

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Mother’s Day is Terrible in There

2018

Mother’s day in there was such a terrible day for me, to be honest.
My mother is very special to me. May she rest in peace.
Only those who have lost their mothers will understand the feeling.
prison, parents

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Alone during Eid

2018

I spent 10 Eids and 10 holidays in prison.
The day before Eid makes everyone sad.
That was the case for the cell I was in.
Everyone would be sad from the day before Eid until the following morning.
prison, motherhood

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Self-Reliance

2018

No one stood beside me, even though I’ve always stood beside everyone.
I stood beside my siblings, husband and my parents-in-law. But no one stood beside me.
I had to depend on myself in there.
prison

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My Uncle is Ashamed of Me

2018

I visited my uncle a few days ago.
My uncle’s well-off, and I ask him for help whenever things get tight.
I received a call from my aunt the other day. She told me that my uncle didn’t want me to visit anymore.
prison, social stigma

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I Steer Clear of Those Things

2018

I was still under investigation when I went to prison.
One of the police officers was called Mofeed. He was a decent man, to be honest.
I saw a 20-year-old girl coming in.
Those kids are considered juveniles until they turn 18. 
prison, physical violence

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