Farida met Aly during the revolution in Alexandria.
In an upper-class neighborhood,
In one of the vigilante groups.
Aly was honest at the beginning of their relationship.
He told Farida not to expect him to settle down,
Or for them to be in a traditional relationship.
He was open-minded,
More so than any other man Farida had met.
Aly liberated her of her fears and restrictions.
He made her feel that she wasn’t always in control of herself.
It all started with Aly confessing his admiration,
And that he wasn’t boyfriend material and all that.
Or at least at first.

Farida: “I don’t want to be in a relationship now either.
Believe me, Aly, you’re not what I’m looking for.”
Farida convinced herself of these things.
She didn’t know that she was fooling herself.
He knew she was lying,
Because he knew her better than anyone else.

Then Aly started to distance himself,
And so did Farida.
She’d say he wasn’t boyfriend material,
And that it wasn’t worth it.
She was looking for someone else.
Someone who was just like him.

That’s when Seif appeared in Farida’s life.
He lived in Australia but was here on vacation.
He was fifteen years older than her.
He wanted to get married.
He was open-minded and belonged to a good family.
Farida tried to like him,
But it wasn’t happening.
She tried to find a connection similar to the one she had with Aly.
But there wasn’t one.
She just wanted things to work out with Seif.
Because it meant that she’d never have to see or talk to Aly again.
But then Aly resurfaced.

Aly: “I miss you, Farida. I want you. I can’t live without you.
My parents are travelling soon.
Why don’t you come stay with me in Alexandria for a few days?”
Farida: “Aly, I don’t know if I want to do this again.
I want to settle down, but you don’t.”
Aly: “I was honest with you from the beginning.
Being with me is more fun that settling down.”
Farida: “Yes, definitely.”
Aly: “Why were you mad at me last time?”
Farida: “Because you weren’t being nice.”
Aly: “I was worried about you.
I’m not a bad person.
I knew you were falling for me.”
Farida: “You’re being too cocky.
I liked you, yes. But I wasn’t in love with you.
Relax. You’re not the one I’m looking for.”
Aly: “So you’re just playing around with me,
Until you marry Seif.”
Farida: “You’re not cut out for this kind of life.”
Aly: “When and how did you meet Seif?
Are you happy with him?”
Farida: “I met him a while ago.
I’m neither happy nor unhappy.
There’s something weighing me down.”
Aly: “I won’t let you settle for just any guy.
I saw a side of you you never knew existed.
Don’t ever hide it.
It’ll make you miserable if you do.
I feel like you’re my responsibility.”
Farida: “Wow. What’s all this talk?
I don’t know what to say.”

Time went by with Farida constantly thinking about Aly.
She knew he’d never change.
But she admired his honesty.
She knew he wasn’t fooling her.
Aly called her again.

Aly: “I want to see you, Farida.
Can you come to Alexandria this week?
I want to spend time with you.”
Farida: “I was coming to meet my friends,
And I’d love to see you.”

A week later.
Farida: “Aly, I’m here.”
Aly: “You’re mine today.
You’re not seeing anyone else.”
Farida: “Okay.”

She was over the moon when she finally met him.
They were all over each other for four hours.
They were the last ones to leave the cafe.
Aly told her about his life for the first time.
He told her that his mother passed away when he was young,
And then his father passed away.
That’s why he doesn’t like getting close to people.
Farida didn’t get what he was trying to say.
Perhaps it was the alcohol talking.
Or maybe he was trying to tell her why they couldn’t be together.

They talked for a long time the following day.
They met again in the same place.
Aly: “What’s wrong, beautiful?”
Farida: “I don’t know.
I’m in a bad mood.”
Aly: “What happened?”
Farida: “A lot of things.
I’m fed up with my parents.”
Aly: “Don’t try to fool me, Farida.
Tell me what’s wrong.”
Farida: “I don’t know.”
Aly: “You like pretending to be strong,
But I can still see your sensitive side,
So drop the act.”

Farida: “The world doesn’t revolve around you, Aly.
I don’t know what you’re trying to get at.
Yes, I liked you for a while back then,
But it’s over now.”
Aly: “If you say so.
You’re only proving me right.”
Farida: “Fine.
I want to go home now.”
Aly: “I like making you challenge yourself because I care about you.”
Farida: “I hate how good you are at doing that.”

Farida was completely devastated that day.
She thought to herself,
“Do I really love him?
Of course not.
He said he doesn’t want to be in a relationship.
But then he said he wouldn’t let anyone take me away from him.
Perhaps if this is what I really want,
Then I should be more patient.
No.
Aly is just a regular guy.
It’s just been a while since I’ve been close to a guy.
I’m sure I can find someone like Aly.
Please God,
Can you help me find someone just like him?”

Aly: “How are you, love?
What are your plans today?
I wish I could meet you, but I’m having lunch with my cousin.”
Farida: “I’m moving to Lebanon, Aly.
I got a job there.”
Aly: “What job?
I don’t like that.
I’m not happy about it.
Come live with me in Alexandria.”
Farida: “No, Aly.
You can come visit.”

Later,
Aly: “Why did you come back to Egypt, Farida?
Come spend a couple of days with me.”
Farida: “I can’t, Aly.
I have to stay with my parents.”
Aly: “As you like.
I want you to stay.
I’ll take you to the station tomorrow.”

On the way to the station,
Aly: “I like spending time with you, Farida.
I enjoy every second with you.”
Farida: “You sound as if you’re doing me a favor being with me.”
Aly: “Did you tell anyone about us?”
Farida: “What’s there to tell?”
Aly: “Why are you being like this?
You’re just proving me right.”
Farida: “There’s nothing to prove.”
Aly: “If you say so.
When am I seeing you again?”
Farida: “I’ll call you.”

Farida has been trying to convince herself that she doesn’t love Aly ever since she came back.
She’s been trying to convince herself that she doesn’t want to be with him,
And that she’ll find someone better.
But she failed miserably.
Aly had taken over her heart.
She’d do anything for him.
It’s a beautiful feeling.
It’s the most beautiful feeling a person could ever feel.
But she knows she’s not supposed to show these feelings.
It breaks her heart.

Aly already knows.
But he’s too afraid to do anything.
They’re both stuck in limbo.
Farida keeps hoping to find someone like Aly.
Please God,
Help me find someone like him.