I’m 43 years old.
I got married to him twenty years ago.
Not a single year has passed by without being beaten and humiliated,
Or going through a scandal and a divorce.
He’s stingy and horrible.
He humiliates me in front of everyone.
He’s sick.
He has a terrible personality,
And he’s weak.
He can't even perform in bed.
He always finds something to hold over my head.
I’m fed up with him.

My only source of income is my job,
Which pays me 2,000 LE every month.
I’m an English teacher,
And I’m quite smart.
I think he’s jealous of that.
He beat me numerous times.
He pushed me one time against the piano.
I fell on my back,
And almost died.
I was in an accident before,
and I broke my back,
So it’s fragile.
It was his fault, of course.
He wouldn’t let me put on my seatbelt.
“Who do you think you are?” he kept telling me.

I have three daughters,
Whom he verbally abuses.
“If you don’t shut up,
I’ll fuck you,” he’d tell them.
He let go of me one time,
Grabbed my youngest daughter,
And banged her head against the wall.
He smashed a glass door on my eldest daughter’s head.
Something could’ve happened to her.
He kicked my middle daughter,
And she fell on the floor.
I slapped him across the face.
“I’ll kill you!” I said.
He divorced me that day,
But my parents made me go back to him.
He divorced me four times,
And every time my parents would send me back.

I’m tired,
And I hate him,
But I don’t have a source of income.
My three daughters and I can’t live off 2,000 LE.
I don’t have any savings,
Because I spend all my money on them.
My father is bedridden,
And my mother takes care of him.
They’re both living off their pension,
Which barely covers their expenses.
Even buying medication is difficult for them.
My siblings are barely getting by.
That’s why I can’t do anything about it.
I’m tired,
And my mental health is deteriorating.

People are shit, they won’t leave anyone alone.
People think I should put up with it.
Even though they know nothing about what’s going on with me.
“You should be used to it by now.
You’ve been with him for twenty years,
So you know how he is.”
They make me despise myself.
I’m fed up.

Don’t get me started about his family.
His siblings are horrible,
And they say shit about me all the time.
My mother-in-law stole my gold 13 years ago.
She gave them back to me years later,
But they were missing some items.
His siblings treat me horribly.
Although all of them are educated,
And hold senior positions.
My mother-in-law used to work as a Manager.
My husband, his siblings, and their spouses,
All work good jobs.
They have a good reputation,
But in reality they’re horrible with each other.