I just finished reading one of your stories,
About a mother who body shamed her daughter.
My relationship with my mother has been traumatic.
My mother always did the same thing:
She’d make fun of how I looked generally,
Not just my weight,
Even though I wasn’t fat before I got married,
But she always said I looked poor.

I have oily skin,
And I always had acne as a teenager.
One time,
During a summer vacation with my parents,
My mother looked over at me,
And she said something that felt like a stab to the heart,
I’ll never forget it.
She said:
“That doesn’t look like the skin of a 14 year old.
You look disgusting.”

At one point in my life,
I volunteered with an initiative that rehabilitated street children.
My mother renamed me “street child” on her phone.
She also always made fun of my hair.
She called it the “brillo pad sticking out of your head.”
She also thought I was too much like a man.
“How will you ever dance at your own wedding?
You’ll definitely embarrass us.”

I eventually got married and had children,
But I still cry whenever I think about our relationship,
Or the things she used to say to me.
She’s that way with all of my siblings,
Except my eldest brother.

My mother is the reason why,
I believe a distinction should be made between biological mothers and true mothers.
It’s the main reason why I try to be good with my daughter.
I don’t want her to be like me.
I want her to grow up with self-confidence.

I don’t understand why people make such a big deal about mothers,
Why mother’s day exists,
And why we talk so much about the “sacrifices” mothers make.
Especially since mothers are completely capable of damaging their children,
Just like my mother did.