May You Be Next

2006

“When do you plan on getting married?” my father, aunts, uncles, and cousins always ask me.
Or if we’re at a wedding, they always say ou’balik [may you be next].
I wonder how the elders of the family would react if I walked around at funerals and poked them, saying “Ou’balik!”

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Why can’t you be the top student?

2017

Studying is something I’ve been used to doing ever since I was young. I feel like something’s missing if I don’t study.
Or I feel unsafe.
Despite this, I actually hate studying!
No matter how much I study, mama always thinks that I’m playing, and that I don’t care about my studies.
She thinks extracurricular student activities, meetings, and conferences are useless!

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The Fabric on My Head

2009

Everyone believes that this piece of fabric not only covers my head, but my brain too, affecting its ability to function intellectually.
I’m always told that my actions and ideas don’t befit my headscarf.
People always expect me to act like a nun, and to always defend the headscarf and the conduct of every covered female.

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Why Aren't You Engaged?

2017

My mother says that a girl’s degree and her career are more important than marriage.
They are her weapons.
That way, if she gets married and any trouble arises between her and her husband,
She’ll still have her career.
marriage, social pressure, engagement

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We’ll Force the Veil on You

2015

“We’ll force you to wear the veil.”
We heard that line a lot from Salafis.
We heard it from bus drivers and people who sat next to us on buses and metros.
We heard it constantly.

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Bleep

2012

How is it that he molests me, and takes away a part of me,
but I’m expected to censor myself when I tell the story?
I regret ever listening to what you had to say,
to what you call traditional or proper or haram.

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My Fault

2017

I think I was 9 or 10 years old.
I was at the marketplace with my aunt,
When a man with a crutch, and who was older than my grandfather, groped my behind.
He kept walking around in the market looking for other girls to grope.
I looked at him in disgust and anger.
gender violence, sexual violence, rape, social stigma, social pressure, the street

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August's Sun

2017

A relative of mine who works in construction,
Decided to take me to work with his brother-in-law.
Back then, I was in middle school.
Around 12 years old.
I hadn’t worked a day in my life,
And now I was to start work in August?
Everyone in Aswan knows what the sun’s like in August.
masculinity, social pressure, work

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The Hymen

2014

In my family, it’s neither accepted nor allowed for a girl to not be a virgin before marriage.
I don’t know how intercourse works, and I’m afraid of it.
I feel that the hymen itself is shackling and imprisoning me.

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Be a Well-mannered Girl

2014

“Keep your arms folded across your chest.
Keep your legs together to one side.
Straighten your back.
Keep your eyes ahead or on the ground.
If you want to smile, make sure it’s a subtle smile.
Don’t open your mouth when you smile.

FULL STORY
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