The Rules of Manhood

2016

I have to sit a certain way, I can't move my hands when I speak.
I can't cry around people, and if someone hits me, I have to hit them back. These are just a few examples of things I should do if I want "to be a man."
I’m still going to be myself, no matter how much this costs me and no matter how many times people tell me that I'm "not a man."

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At the Holy Kaaba

2014

As I was leaving Hijr-Ismail—it can get really crowded there—I felt someone shove their hand between my legs and grope me.
I immediately spun around and started punching the man behind me.
“In front of the Holy Kaaba, you kaafir?!” I screamed.

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You Must Fight Back

2014

There is a voice in my head that says,
“You gotta stick up for yourself.
How can you not do anything?
Beat them up!
You gotta fight back.”

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August's Sun

2017

A relative of mine who works in construction,
Decided to take me to work with his brother-in-law.
Back then, I was in middle school.
Around 12 years old.
I hadn’t worked a day in my life,
And now I was to start work in August?
Everyone in Aswan knows what the sun’s like in August.
masculinity, social pressure, work

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Just a Piece of Paper

2016

Because she wanted her own place.
She wanted to live.
That’s what a marriage contract was to her: freedom.

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I’m Responsible for You

2015

"God is going to punish me for you being like that!”
I was sad that my brother, who is the closest person to me
Is treating me like I was a sin that God is going to punish him for.

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A Sissy

2017

I used to judge people by their appearance.
I would think a girl was loose if I saw one smoking a cigarette, for example.
I would also judge girls if they were wearing provocative clothes.
masculinity, social stigma, social pressure, the street

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Freedom of Choice

2014

After a certain age,
A girl no longer has the freedom to choose a suitable person to marry.

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White Hair

2016

The first time I found a white hair, I stood in front of the mirror for about 15 minutes trying to make sure it was real!
Is this really a white hair? Oh my God! I’m only 22!

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Wanting to Move Out

2014

I wanted to move out and live alone.
My father, in order to prevent me from leaving,
Locked the door and chased after me.
My mother came after us.

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