Why is it wrong for people to know?
Why is it something to be ashamed of?
Why do we use euphemisms such as “I got you-know-what,”
Or “Did you get it?”
Or “Has it shown up?”
Why am I not allowed to go to church when I’m on my period?

I first got my period when I was in the 7th grade.
A few months prior to getting it,
My mother had told me everything about it.
She told me about her own experience,
And told me what to do when I got it.
I was alone the first time I got it,
But I knew what to do.

I remember the exact day.
It was on a Friday in February.
My mother had told us, ever since we were 10 years old,
That we’d start wearing the hijab as soon as we got it,
Because it’s a religious obligation.
I’d hoped I’d never get it.

My mother passed away when I was young, before I got my period.
My grandmother was living with us at the time,
And I never heard about periods.
I was ten years old and I had exams,
I went to the bathroom and found blood in my underwear.
womanhood, period

I was 10 the first time I got it.
I was in the fifth grade then and it happened the night before an exam.
I thought “the monthly cycle” lasted an entire month,
And that I wouldn’t be able to play ever again.
I never wanted to grow up, even when I was younger.
womanhood, period

I was scared because everyone told me that,
Once I got my period and hit puberty,
A lot of things were going to change:
I wouldn’t be able to wear shorts anymore or ride bikes,
Or play with boys on the street.
gender identity, body image, womanhood, period

That day,
I felt happy,
Because my mother had taken me for a walk around the house,
After my science exam.
I quickly went to the bathroom,
And found blood in my underwear.
I didn’t care.
I put a few tissues,
And decided not to tell anyone.

I love my dawra [cycle].
I call it dawra.
I don’t like using the word “period,”
Because it makes me feel as if I’m ashamed of it.
It’s one of those words we say in another language,
Because we’re too embarrassed of it.
I refer to it as my cycle because I’m not embarrassed by it.

My stomach started to ache really badly.
I found blood.
I stuffed a lot of tissues into my underwear.
I burst into tears and kept crying for some time.
My mother eventually found my stained shorts.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked.
I didn’t know what to say.
We had never exactly been close.
womanhood, period

There was a teacher called Soheir or Siham.
One time, she closed the classroom door during religion class,
And, in a very shy tone, bombarded us with a wealth of information in just three minutes.